Treehouse!

I thought I would try my hand at contributing to the Squires family blog. Ever since Jacob was born, I have been talking about building him a treehouse of some sort. In fact, part of the selection criteria for our new home was an area of trees where a fort-type structure would fit in.

In June, with Jacob's birthday approaching, I decided to set out and take a shot at a little construction. My initial plan was to build a fort on stilts within the trees in our backyard. Of course - since Abby came along, the original treehouse plan morphed into a playhouse/fort...so that's what we decided to build. I told Jacob that Grampy and I would be building him a fort, which he responded with "now?", and expected it to be an hour long project :) Boy - did we underestimate.

With Grampy's help and a lot of sweat and hours, we finally finished a playhouse/fort that Jacob, Abby, and their friends will enjoy for years to come. I think I figured we put in about five weekends and a total of 150 hours of work to build this thing. My dad ended up having a bunch of lumber at no cost which made building the fort that much more fun since it didn't cost a whole lot!

Here are some pics from our adventure:

- Brad

Happy Birthday, Jacob!

I can't believe my little man is three years old! So many times he still seems like my baby, but more and more he seems to be growing up incredibly too fast. The weekend before last we celebrated his big day with all of his close friends and family. We decided on a firetruck theme since this is one thing that Jacob has been into for quite a while. You know toddlers, they jump from one thing to the next. But not so with firetrucks. Jacob has really liked them for a while--he was even a fireman last Halloween. In fact, he got a toy fire truck for his second birthday and it is still by far his favorite toy. From that day on a firetruck party in our future seemed to be inevitable.

We started the day off with swimming and water toys when all of a sudden we heard a huge "honk" out front. We all ran outside to be greeted by an actual firetruck and three firemen! Grampy had apparently stopped by the firestation down the street on his way to the party and invited them to join us! Although Jacob was a little overwhelmed, he slowly warmed up and explored the truck and talked to the firemen (while I was carrying him, of course). I don't know who had more fun, Jacob or myself. I was so in awe of the fact that they would take time out of their day to visit a three year old's party. What great guys they were and what a great memory we will always have. That night in Jacob sleep Brad and I actually heard him mutter, "firetrucks" over his monitor. It really did make a big impact on him.

We finished the party with a bbq, cake and presents. It was so wonderful to have everyone over to celebrate with us. The day had been a difficult one for me. When my dad found out his cancer was terminal he said that he just hoped that he made it to Jacob's birthday. It was much harder than I thought it was going to be, but it was so wonderful to have so many loving friends and family there. Although there was a definite void, I know that Jacob felt so loved that day and that is what was most important to me!

Happy Birthday, Jacob!

Icing on the Cupcake

Last week my sister and I ventured to a local cupcakery to satisfy our sweet tooth and spend time with the kids. This place was absolutely adorable--a little retro-diner style bakery serving only cupcakes! I don't know who had more fun, the kids or us! Jacob enjoyed decorating his cake with the Smarties that came with it and I devoured my "pinkalicious" dessert. Gotta love anything with that fun name!

A girl and her shoes.

We found out something new about Abby today--she is a shoe girl. While I was trying to get the kids ready and out the door, she kept disappearing into my bedroom only to return with a mismatched pair of shoes for me to wear. She would put the shoes on my feet and then retreat back to the closet to bring me another pair. But when she returned she looked confused, as if she didn't remember that she brought out the first pair or maybe she was wondering why I was still wearing shoes that were so "five minutes ago".

Today is also the first time that I let Abby choose her own shoes to wear. I love the ones that she selected. Although they clashed a bit with the outfit, a good pair of shoes can't be passed up!

My "Problems" in Perspective

I used to think that I had problems--a frustration with my children, a fight with my husband, an insecurity within myself. These things seemed so huge to me, and don't get me wrong, they were at the time. When something goes wrong in our world everything seems to come crashing down. Many times in my adult life I have felt like life just wasn't fair and that my world as I knew it was falling apart.

Now I realize that all of those little things were just day to day troubles that really had no lasting affect on my job as a mother, on my marriage, or who I am in Christ. But now I honestly feel like my world really is falling apart. My problems seem so huge, so "right there in my face" to the point that I can't go a day or even an hour without feeling like I am going to fall apart myself. My problems now involve my dilemma of how to find the words to say when my mom says how awful it is to be alone and how hard it is to move forward when the one you're supposed to move forward with isn't there. My problems consist of me trying to shove the images out of my head of a man that can hardly swallow his pain medication because cancer has overtaken his body and he's in the process of dying. My problems consist of my son telling me that he misses his Papa and is sad that Jesus took him away. My problems are trying to pretend that things are getting better because that's what everyone expects (and what I expected, for that matter) when they are really getting so much worse.

My problems are different now. My pain is more real that I ever thought it could be. But my trust in the Lord is much stronger. I know that in my despair that He is the only one who can pull me out. He has given me a desire to try to find happiness in the midst of sorrow. He has given me so much joy in my marriage and He has given me unbelievable friends to lean on. He has also given me the gift of being able to understand pain and I pray that through Him I can empathize with those right in the midst of their own pain.

The grief counselor that met with our family when we started hospice with Dad helped me find the words to say to Jacob during Dad's final days. She kept telling me that I was equipping him with tools that he would use later in life--that by understanding death (as much as he could) at such a young age, that he would be able to face any tragedies that could come his way. Each encounter with sadness and sorrow was one more tool in his box that he could pull out one day to help someone else to get through a difficult time.

How true for myself, too. But as much as I don't want to carry around this toolbox, I know that God has placed me in this position for a reason. I pray that He can heal me, strengthen me, and use me for His glory. I pray that He uses these tools to build me into someone a little more like Him--someone that has seen sadness, but someone who can rejoice and praise God in the midst of it all knowing that there will come a day when every tear will be wiped away and sorrow will be felt no more. It's the hope of that day that motivates me, that excites me, and that pushes me forward closer to the goal of eternity with my Savior.

Hot Summer Days

Although we have a pool this year, it's far too much of an adventure to take both kiddos in while Brad is at work. Instead we have found some great local parks that have water features. Jacob has become quite the little fishy and loves to run through the "waterfalls" and lay in the "streams". Abby, on the other hand, is quite content to sit with Mommy on the blanket and eat snacks all afternoon. Here are a few of my favorite park pictures.